Monday, 7 March 2011

All you need is to whitewash these old walls...

...and paint something new. It's an idealistic concept that you could just throw white paint at your entire life and rewrite everything.

I know, I know! I've been gone ages yet again. I'm just genuinely useless at remembering this thing exists. A few things have changed since my last post so here's a quick update...I'm no longer running to raise money for ayme as they blew that with supporting some stupid new research so I'm now running for ME Research UK and you can sponsor me here, . Please, Thankyou =]

Another thing, I failed at the Project 365. Or rather I just couldn't be bothered with it and frankly my life is too dull to keep even myself entertained with pictures from it so there we have it, FAIL!

And one other thing...Mark has a job!!! I'm really relieved but Mark, ever the optimist, isn't happy until he has signed the contract and started the job in May.

Now, back to the whitewashed walls. Life is full of colour, full of memories and people that make us what we are but the colours are not always bright. Sometimes they are just different shades of grey. The memories are there but when the people are missing, it's like being stuck in a perpetual winter with no sign of spring with all the vibrancy of life.

I was made blatantly aware of such a perpetual winter when I had a view of the rainbow that is normal life. It was Mark's birthday and we went out for a meal and drinks with a couple of his friends. It was a really good evening and it was so good to have normality. Friendship made all the difference to making that a good night. When I got home a day later and was on my own, I felt the shades of grey seeping back in. I became painfully aware of how much I had blocked out the lack of friends in my life. It was never something that bothered me because I had got so used to being on my own after I got ill and not having friends to confide in but after that evening, it hit me and I realised how much I miss having friends around and just the normality of it all.

I'd been watching the birds flying around without me for so long that I'd forgotten what it is like to fly with them in the coloured skies instead of watching from the forest locking in that perpetual winter. It's probably an odd description of birds and colour but it explains things perfectly.

It would be nice to be able to throw white paint at those aspects of my life that are shaded grey and paint it every colour of the rainbow. Or have a few flowers grow in that forest of winter darkness.

Ramble, Ramble, Ramble!

(Pictures from WeHeartIt)

Quote of the Day: Sometimes you need to catch a glimpse of the rainbow to realise all you need is a dash of colour to banish the grey.